A bear scratched me today!

Yeah, it's true! A bear was licking my arm and it scratched me as I tried to get away. It was all part of a tour that Matt and I took at a zoo about 5 minutes from our house that takes endangered, unwanted, confiscated animals from all over the US. We saw literally lions and tigers and bears! The monkeys were a fun attraction, and I had a lemur crawl all over my shoulders and dig in my purse. Fun times. A friend who I worked with at Starbucks who also works full time at Zoo to You gave an exclusive tour for us employees (and former employees like myself). On my days off I love doing these sorts of things which are fun and out of the ordinary of my regular schedule. I have Sundays and Mondays off. Sunday often feels like a work day with church, and so Monday is my day to do whatever I want. This isn't something you would hear from most working people, but I dare to say it: God, Thank you for Mondays!

Broken

This week I realized how broken everything is. Things, relationships, people are not as they should be. I spent some time with a foster child this week and as soon as I was done with the contact I got in my car and immediately started to put on some soothing jazz music. I had rolled down the windows, put on delightful/light/problem-free music, and began daydreaming of the delicious meal I would make to warm my belly and satisfy my hunger. As I rode home I realized what I was doing...running from the brokenness of that child's life and circumstances. I was trying to air out my car of the misfortune, neglect, and abuse that this child has seen in one short lifetime. Once I realized my sad attempt (to feel as if this world is right) wasn't working I just sat there, and allowed myself to take a mental and emotional bath in the broken reality of this world.

Yeah, this job is going to be hard, no doubt about it. People in the social work "business" speak
of leaving work problems at work. Sure...if there exists a button in your brain that helps you compartmentalize your experiences, then good for you. I personally haven't found that button to be easily accessible. Outside of our back door we have an emergency light that comes on when people approach at night. It has two big lights on it that shine in opposite directions. I have looked at that light and thought it is big enough to hang my problems on before I come in after a broken day's work. But honestly, some days it just doesn't seem big enough to mentally afix my work burdens on. Other day's I glide right past that light and spend the evening preparing dinner or doing whatever evening activities with a light heart not thinking about my day.

Honestly I am really thankful for those days when I don't think about work after hours. On the one hand, I don't want to become hardened to the reality of this brokenness like some crusted old shell of a social worker, unaffected by the nastiness of many children's experiences. On the other hand I have got to learn to compartmentalize. What I am doing is glorious in a small way--giving dignity, kindness, and normalcy to these children's lives in the form of a ride, conversation, activity in the community. But here is the best part....I am not God. Bingo! There it is...that is key to how I can compartmentalize. I can give a small piece of love and kindness and be a part of God's GRAND, HUMONGOUS, CERTAIN plan of redemption. So here I go, sent out like an army soldier with a seemingly small mission that is part of a grand scheme. And when I come home at night, I can hang my day's work on that light knowing that this world is broken and I can both cry about it and then come inside, trust Jesus, and go on with my life.

Matt, the incredible!

So I believe my husband is a superhero. Let me paint you a picture to explain why. Matt calls me while I am driving home from work at around 6:30 this evening. I am tired, thirsty, and hungry, and I readily dump these three facts on him in a slightly complaining manner (what can I say...it was a long day!). We chat a few minutes and then hang up. Twenty-five minutes later I roll up the drive way and come to a stop thinking about all the stuff I need to lug out of the car and carry into the house when I hear the back door of the house shut. Running feverishly towards me is my husband, a tall glass of water in one hand, a banana in the other hand, and very panicked look on his face. As soon as he reaches me he shoves the water in my hand and the banana in my mouth all the while saying, "Hurry, hurry!" Once I finished almost choking on the banana from laughing so hard I thanked him for being so awesome and thoughtful in meeting my "dire hunger and thirst needs". Often he will come out and greet me in the driveway when I drive up after a hard days work. Wow! I love him for his superhero powers of cheering me up and showing me that I am loved.

P.S. This picture of Matt was taken last week on the 4 day hike that he led. He and 3 other leaders took 11 kids into the Sierras Mountains and all returned to speak of it!

Five weeks overdue

Well it has certainly been a busy five weeks since I last posted. You might imagine the new job would be to blame...and you are right. Lots of training and driving have consumed many hours of my time in the last month. It has been wonderful to be employed, getting a paycheck, and gaining new knowledge. The job has its ups and downs, but most of all I am thankful for the blessing of a job.

A few weeks ago Matt and I went camping with the church. We stayed on a site with a family, and we had a wonderful time with them. They have a little girl who is very shy, and Matt made it his personal mission to gain her affection. By the end of the trip, this was the closest he got to her (see picture below.)


Well, we are off to enjoy our day off. More to come later on the last month's adventures of Matt and Alina.